If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
