Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
