The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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