she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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