Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize