I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
She even gives head with a lisp.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
