I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Randomize