Is that why you're texting me
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.