I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
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I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
drinking out of a sandbucket again
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
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I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.