He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize