i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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