So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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