you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
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