but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
