ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Randomize