Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Porn is love you can see.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
i think my cat just said my name.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
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