I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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