are you still at the devil's house?
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
