Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Only a mothe r could love this liver
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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