I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.