I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize