He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Oh god it's open bar.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
