Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
