But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
It's Friday. Sex?
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
