Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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