Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
