i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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