Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Randomize
