What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
