I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize