SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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