wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I enjoy the company of your penis
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
