took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
