Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
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hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites