i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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