I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize