I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
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