She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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