mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
