I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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