And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I have demons in me.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize