I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
