its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like Dick and happiness
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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