We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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