Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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