who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Randomize
