He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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