Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
