Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize