There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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