Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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